Tag Archives: funny

Book Review: A Unicorn Named Sparkle

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A Unicorn Named Sparkle

I recently read A Unicorn Named Sparkle by Amy Young and it seriously gave me a case of the giggles.

I mean, it’s a story about a little girl who orders a unicorn for 25 cents from an ad in the back of a magazine (whoever tells you that’s not a dream come true is lying), but what shows up is a goat with an ice cream cone stuck to his forehead.

How can you not love this premise?

It’s a delightful picture book that my children found to be fun and silly.  The illustrations are bright and colorful and … sparkly.

Lucy’s wild hair and polka dot shirt are painted with soft watercolors and dance across pages of wide white spreads, and the baby unicorn/goat practically dances right into your heart with his own little heart-shaped cutie mark.

Now, when Lucy imagines what kind of unicorn will be delivered to her, she pictures something perfect and pretty with a flowing mane and impeccable manners.  When the goat arrives, with his scruffy mane and tendency-to-eat-things manners, she decides to return him.

The truck arrives to take him back, but, luckily, Lucy realizes her mistake before it’s too late.

Because although he was not quite what she expected, “she had to admit:  sometimes he made her smile and sometimes he made her laugh.”  And while friends might not always be perfect, they are certainly precious.

So if you or your kids love unicorns (or goats), check out A Unicorn Named Sparkle for a fun and charming story!

Happy Reading!

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A Mom’s Counting Primer [A Poetic Parody]

Posted in momisms, wanderings in the world & web, writing by

blocks 123

So, a couple of weeks ago I had these nagging words in my head that needed to be written down.

It really started as a kid’s book.  Some sort of humorous counting primer.

It didn’t stay a kid’s book long.

It became a poem for moms who know what it’s like to count.  You know, the you’d-better-do-what-I-told-you-to-do-before-I-get-to-three type of counting.

But the mom in the poem is nice.  She goes up to ten.  (Kind of.)

I recently joined Wattpad, so I posted the poem there.  Grab a glass of wine and head on over to check it out (seriously, I think the whole thing is shorter than this blog post).  Then please share it with all the moms you know that could use a little “time out.”  ;)

Here’s the poem:

A Mom’s Counting Primer [A Poetic Parody]

Enjoy!

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A History of Noms de Plume

Posted in musings, writing by

I just had to share this infographic!

This stuff is fascinating.  Obviously I knew some of these facts – but I still learned SO much by reading this.

And – I’ll have it known – I’m seriously considering changing my pen name to Secretary to the Emperor of the Moon.

Printerinks-Whodunit

I’d love to hear any stories of pen names that you’d like to share!

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(photo credit:  http://www.printerinks.com/a-history-of-noms-de-plume-infographic.html)

Roaming Rosie Reads “Monsters Aren’t Real” by Kerstin Schoene {book review}

Posted in books & book reviews, roaming rosie reads, usborne by

Roaming Rosie Reads

Monsters Aren’t Real by Kerstin Schoene is an enchanting picture book that my kids are absolutely in love with.

It’s 44 pages long, but many of the pages have no words at all, or only a few.  Wordless picture books are great for Little Ones.  Plus, the story is packed full of laughs, which always makes reading fun.

The book is about a monster who’s keeps hearing “monster’s aren’t real,” which leads him to wonder, “then what am I?”  He’s as big as a monster… as strong as a monster… so monsters MUST be real.  Right??

Monster's Aren't Real {picture book review}

Our gentle monster tries to prove that he’s real by attempting to scare people.  He says “boo” and he juggles cows, but nobody is scared.  He tried to spread propaganda via helium balloons and posters {my girls always giggle about the poster that’s upside down}, but nobody’s paying attention.

He gets sad and concludes that monsters aren’t, in fact, real.  But then another crazy-looking monster shows up {this one’s my 3yo’s favorite} and insists that they ARE real.

I often have to reread and reread and reread those last two pages.  My girls read them along with me, bursting into laughter every single time.

When the book is over, I always ask, “are monsters real?” and they shout, “NO!”

And then they laugh some more.

You can watch me reading the book in the video below:

And you can purchase the book from Usborne Books & More:

Monsters Aren’t Real

If you’re Little One is a big monster fan, they may also enjoy:

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Happy Reading!

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Phrenologically Speaking……

Posted in musings by

phrenologically speaking...

So I’m reading a novel on my tablet and this particular word was bothering me because it was SO familiar, but I couldn’t quite place it.

What does it mean?  What does it mean?  What does….. oh, wait!  I can look words up on my tablet!  Sweet!

And this is the definition I get:  phrenologically: (phrenological) of or relating to phrenology

Seriously???

I mean – REALLY?

You know, when I was in school {granted it was many years ago} we weren’t allowed to use the word we were defining in the definition.

Apparently Google Books doesn’t have the same restrictions.

Of course, I soon afterwards picked up a book that used the word repeatedly.  But by then, I’d remembered what it meant.  Because I looked it up.  In a real dictionary.

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Coffee Is My Boyfriend, But Books Are My Lovers

Posted in books & book reviews, coffee, wanderings in the world & web by

Coffee is my Boyfriend but Books are my Lovers art wood prints and wrapped canvases at RoamingRosie.com

Coffee is my boyfriend, but books are my lovers.

Because we all need priorities in life.

:)

Check out my newest art here:

Coffee is my Boyfriend Wood Print

Books are my Lovers Wood Print

Coffee is my Boyfriend Wrapped Canvas

Books are my Lovers Wrapped Canvas

And I hope you enjoy the art as much as your coffee and your books!

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10 Things I Never Expected to Say {Or: A Typical Day in the Life of a Mom}

Posted in momisms, musings by

10 Things I Never Expected to Say OR A Typical Day in the Life of a Mom from RoamingRosie.com

Motherhood has brought with it many unexpected surprises.

Most of them are phenomenally, euphorically amazing. The rest are…

Messy.

{That’s putting it mildly.}

And these are some of the unexpected words that have crossed my lips in the first 5 years of my daughters’ lives.

Things I hope I won’t have to say again {but know that I probably will}.

10 Things I Never Expected to Say

1.  I ran out of tissues; just use my shirt.

2.  Why are you naked?

3.  I didn’t know diarrhea could shoot that far – you almost hit Grandma!

4.  No, no: throw up on me, not the couch!

5.  Did I just step in syrup?

6.  No, I don’t need a tampon, and I certainly don’t need a handful of them … where are all the wrappers?

7.  Don’t stick your fingers in the dog’s butt!

8.  I don’t care how cold you are, you’re not getting back in the bathtub until I clean all of the poop out of it.

9.  Get your hands out of the toilet!

10.  Did you just put my ChapStick in your butt?

My second favorite chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. Erma Bombeck

Please share some of the unexpectedness you’ve experienced in the comment section!

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{Top Photo Copyright Rebecca Abell | Dreamstime Stock Photos}

You Should Be Writing

Posted in wanderings in the world & web, writing by

You Should Be Writing

This is a reminder I constantly need.

Luckily, I’m not the only person who gets distracted.

Or, should I say, the only fangirl who gets distracted.

So I’ve put together this collection of posters for motivation.

You’re welcome.  :)

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

 

You Should Be Writing

 

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

You Should Be Writing

I hope you’ve found some inspiration amidst the gorgeous distractions.

But seriously:  shouldn’t you be writing?

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A Strange Discovery

Posted in wanderings in the world & web by

Homeward Bound Movie Ticket Stubs

I was sorting through some boxes and found a few old wallets of mine.

Most of them I kept to give to my girls to play with.  What little girl doesn’t love a pink wallet with a picture of Mickey and Minnie?

{I’d use it myself if it had more pockets.}

Darn near threw one of the old wallets into the “donate” box without looking through each and every pocket and slot.  On second inspection, I found some cash.

That’s would have made someone’s day at Goodwill.

Anyway, the strangest thing I found, aside from the vintage-looking 90’s bills, was this pair of movie ticket stubs.

Homeward Bound??

And does that say February 27, 1993???

Why in hell had I saved these?  I almost never purposefully save movie stubs, so why these?

Truth be told, Homeward Bound is a good movie.  I think.  I haven’t been able to watch it since I was a kid, but I know it was something everyone loved.  And with the good old fashioned wholesome fun of a ragtag team of two dogs and a cat on a journey across America, it became something that our middle school teachers loved to show during the classes that took place right before a vacation or break.

And, inevitably, try as I might to ignore the movie, I would fail to block it out.  And I would cry.  Profusely.

Silently sobbing and cursing my teachers as I wiped away the snot with rough, brown recycled paper towels.

I would spend the next couple of hours sporting a red, puffy, tear-stained face as I progressed through the school day.

Because it was never shown at the end of the day.  Oh no, only near the beginning, to make absolutely certain that I’d sniffle my way through as many classes as possible.

I came to hate the movie.

So it did surprise me a bit to find those ticket stubs wedged into the slot of one of my old wallets.  What were they doing there?

And WHY did the movie only cost $3.25???

Maybe because it was a “dollar theatre” matinee, but after the shock and the shudder that the movie title always brings to me faded, that was what drew my attention.

If movies were still three bucks, I’d go a heck of a lot more often.

But I still wouldn’t keep the ticket stubs.

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